They don’t like to talk about their feelings and have a strong preference for autonomy. Because of this, they tend to use anything they can to become more attached to their partner-including sex-and their fear can turn sex into something emotionally painful rather than enjoyable.įinally, people with an avoidant attachment style are emotionally distant and threatened by intimacy. On the other hand, those with an anxious attachment style are plagued by low self-esteem and constantly worry about the state of their relationship.
These characteristics naturally lead to healthier and more enjoyable sex because having a close and vulnerable relationship with your partner makes it easier to experience pleasure during sex. Once you understand these factors, and how to influence them, you can create for yourself better sex and more profound pleasure than you ever thought possible.Although Nagoski identifies the three types of attachment styles, she doesn’t discuss the general characteristics of each type and how they lead to a specific kind of sexual behavior.Īccording to the book Attached, individuals with a secure attachment style are loving partners who are comfortable with intimacy and communication. Which means that stress, mood, trust, and body image are not peripheral factors in a woman’s sexual wellbeing they are central to it. And all the complications of everyday life influence the context surrounding a woman’s arousal, desire, and orgasm.Ĭutting-edge research across multiple disciplines tells us that the most important factor for women in creating and sustaining a fulfilling sex life, is not what you do in bed or how you do it, but how you feel about it. So we never need to judge ourselves based on others’ experiences. Emily Nagoski is that every woman has her own unique sexuality, like a fingerprint, and that women vary more than men in our anatomy, our sexual response mechanisms, and the way our bodies respond to the sexual world. The first lesson in this essential, transformative book by Dr.
So where is it? Well, for reasons this book makes crystal clear, that pill will never exist-but as a result of the research that’s gone into it, scientists in the last few years have learned more about how women’s sexuality works than we ever thought possible, and Come as You Are explains it all. Researchers have spent the last decade trying to develop a “pink pill” for women to function like Viagra does for men. An essential exploration of why and how women’s sexuality works-based on groundbreaking research and brain science-that will radically transform your sex life into one filled with confidence and joy.
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